September 13, 2013

Dirty Truth: Day One

Friday 13th for unlucky people should just be lucky, right?  Well I've already started this morning by walking out of the house without a jacket (it was 55 degrees at 5am) and my glasses/contacts (pssh, who needs to see?).  Luckily I'm hot-natured and not that blind.

But since Friday 13th is notoriously a scary day, I figured it was a perfect day to start off my Dirty Truth series since the first question is:


I don't have a fear of heights, or spiders, or closed spaces.  Nothing normal.  But I absolutely cannot go anywhere near a roachbug.  The more "appropriate" term may be cockroach.  The real big ones.

I couldn't even google search an image to include in this post.  So you guys get a cartoon. 

source
I don't like how they are gross and ugly.  Or how they run erratically.  Things that you can't predict where they are going to run next are just effing scary. They give me the hibbie-jibbies and I will literally jump on a chair if I see one.

I've even woken Bobby up in the middle of the night because I saw one crawling along his wall in his apartment and I started screaming.  Of course he thought something awful was happening like the place was on fire. But to me, a roachbug within mere inches of me IS awful! He looked at me like, "you seriously woke me up for that?!" and rolled back over.  Uh.... there's still a roachbug ON THE CEILING NOW!!

He grabbed some toilet paper and sleepily tried to grab the ginormous creature (kill the bastard with your shoe!!) but he MISSED!!  The roachbug fell onto the floor and ran under the bed.  Bobby half-assed looked, shrugged his shoulders, and climbed back into bed.  No big deal.


NO BIG DEAL?!  There's just a live roachbug crawling around UNDER THE BED and you want me to GO BACK TO SLEEP like nothing is wrong?!  Are you effing kidding me?!  He looked at me like I was crazy when I just didn't jump back into bed when he did (note that I've been standing in the bedroom doorway the entire time) 

I made him at least check along the wall.  And behind my pillow.  And under the bed one more time.  Then I reluctantly tiptoed back into bed and barricaded myself in with pillows along all sides. 

What is your biggest fear?

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My 30th birthday is October 10th!  I have started a series called Dirty Truth for my Dirty Thirty: 30 Days of Truth.  I will be answering real, sometimes controversial questions around my 30th birthday!  Keep up with all of the questions and find out what's next here



8 comments:

  1. bugs are definitely on my list. like this morning as i opened the shutters to close the window, i saw a spider just hanging out right by the handle (or course it was there). so i yelled for my mom to COME RIGHT NOW!!!! and the poor woman was just about to hop in the shower and ran out with her shower cap and a towel wrapped around herself yelling "WHAT? WHAT'S WRONG?!" to which i pointed and said "A SPIDER! PLEASE KILL IT!!"

    she was not pleased, gave me the stink eye, squished it IN HER HAND and walked away. my mom is my hero

    -kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  2. can't do snakes or heights/edges. nope nada never

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  3. Birds. Like a crippling, burst into tears, won't walk under a tree phobia of birds. Even hummingbirds. Especially Geese. Oh my...

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  4. Umm yeah, hate them! Tell Bobby that is part of his job to kill scary bugs!

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  5. Most anything that can jump AND fly. Cockroaches, those ginormous grasshoppers, you get the idea.

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  6. This is a fun series! Yeah, roaches are ew, ew gross. We get crickets in our house, and oddly enough they don't bother me. It may be because I heard that crickets in your house mean you have a happy home. :)

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  7. Glad to see you got this series started! :) In terms of "normal" fears, I have a real problems with snakes and spiders. In terms of what actually causes me to have a panicky breakdown? Fear of psycho killers in the woods. Which is why I don't into the woods alone. Ever.

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